ashamed...

...that this is the reason my house smells like gasoline today
(not the gas stove, like I thought earlier),
and that Jon waited until my most nauseated moment to introduce me to the American beast that is now banished out of the garage and in the driveway until it can leave here forever.

I know some people are really into all this, but I'm just not. Sue me.

At least Jon doesn't really have it here by choice.
His choice would be something smaller and less smelly, preferably with a prancing horse.