penn, one week old

gorgeous easter 2013

The last week in March brought the best weather we've seen all spring so far, and Easter Sunday may have been the peak of all the beautiful days. The weather this year really fit Easter's purpose well, as it brought me hope and joy and allowed me to associate the new life all around me with the new life offered to us by our Savior and His sacrifice and resurrection. 

Because we have church at 1 pm these days, we let Emory eat a breakfast of sugar, and then joined Jon's family for brunch around 10, after which we rushed home and got ourselves and both boys dressed for church and we actually arrived on time.

this is one of my all time favorite photos--too bad it's only iphone quality. look at those handsome boys!

 after church we snagged a couple photos in the gorgeous weather and even got one of all 4 of us, exhausted as Jon and I look, and as cheeseball as Emory looks, I still love that it's our complete family

 

We ended the day with dinner with my family plus Kenny's parents. These two photos crack me up because of Oliver, the cat, and Emory's position. He looks so tiny next to all those tall people.

 

also, E loves this hat; he chose it at the store and wears it all the time. it even looks good on Amber. adorable.

emory is still our number 1

For several months, I've been trying to soak up the last of Emory's young childhood innocence. I had a realization sometime last fall that he's growing up--every joyful and or painful stage of his life gets him closer to milestones like kindergarten and a little further away from my being my little boy. He's already moved to preferring his dad more than me (I know this is a natural process, especially for Emory who is Jon's miniature clone) and I'm learning to accept it and not take this preference personally. I mean, I'd choose spending time with Jon over anyone else any day as well. Anyway, we've had our struggles with a 3 to 3 1/2 year old gaining more independence over the past several months, but something switched in Emory when Penn was born. He went from allowing insecurities to overcome him to becoming a proud, responsible older brother, relaxed about having a new baby in the house. I'm sure that speaks volumes about my misery in pregnancy the last couple months, but thankfully I know we can all recover from that and move on! We've had only a couple moments since Penn's birth that really remind me that Emory is still as young as he is, and  I'm so happy to see my first little boy blossoming so positively. I adore him. It's crazy how overnight, he seemed so grown up as soon as we met Penn--he's suddenly way heavier, with way bigger features and so much maturity.

And now some photos of the past several months, that epitomize Emory throughout these stages...

with a Ferrari 308 (his favorite) at the LeMay car museum in Tacoma last November (also, those are his favorite pants and he always chooses to wear them when they're clean)

working with his tools to help put the lights on the tree

loving nana and nunu's kitties; playing mariocart on the wii with Amber

pure joy on that face!

dutifully carrying his backpack through the airport for our flight to Salt Lake City

 

enchanted by the snow (and snow plows) in Utah--he sat on the heater of our hotel and watched snow plows and trax whenever we were in our room

loving hot chocolate--for months hot chocolate and play doh went hand in hand

 

using chopsticks for the first time on a "family date;" on a mama date with me to starbucks (I believe we went to subway and the park that day as well, all dictated by where E wanted to spend time)

throwing a birthday party for Jack, his baby, and animals. my third trimester self could only muster cookies, though E requested a cake. also, Jack has been E's best friend, baby, and alter ego for the past several months... Jack loves cheetos for just about every meal and most definitely for protein, he has frisbee and tennis and track, goes to dances, and if E gets in trouble, Jack told him to do it. also of note is the baby in Emory's tummy, who I think is gone now that Penn is here, but he always got the hiccups and kicked often, and E even shared his own pregnancy woes with the midwife during my appointments.

 

loving the spit sucker thing at the dentist; falling asleep on my lap (this happened a couple times in January, and I only realized several days later it was due to a nasty virus we all caught)

loving his overalls and the beach, and scooping rocks with a found shell, of course

 

bringing toy after toy to our room to play in my presence during lazy pregnant mornings; pushing the stroller he's now too big for on several family walks to try to encourage labor and enjoy early spring weather

shaving like his daddy taught him to (don't worry, there's no blade)

How could you not love Emory Shawn? Now here's to hoping having Penn around has cured E of his aversion to primary and sunbeam class--we'll find out this Sunday!

and then i [finally] wasn't pregnant anymore

                                               

It's amazing to me (now that I'm over the hurdle, anyway), how quickly one can change from being miserably huge and pregnant to overjoyed and so full of love for a new little person. After being in labor for weeks, trying everything I could to make labor progress and failing in my attempts, I felt so awful, not able to eat or sleep anymore, that my favorite midwife, Joy said at my impromptu appointment, "I just think you'll feel so much better if you can have this baby." So after not too long talking to her about induction and Jon and I talking together, everything fell into place for little boy number 2 to come to us that very day, 3 weeks ago yesterday. 

We headed from the midwife's office over to the hospital next door where I checked in as the second labor and delivery patient for the day. The nurse got us settled into our room and inserted the IV to start pitocin around 4:30 pm. For the next two hours, even as the drug increased, my contractions felt so minimal that I knew I really had been in labor for at least a month. Add that to being pregnant 3 weeks longer than I was with Emory, and I felt justified in my misery. At 6:30 pm Joy came in to break my water, and I moved to the birthing ball from where for the next hour and a half, I watched Alias with Jon by my side or behind me, rubbing my back as my contractions increased. Around 8 pm I moved to the shower/tub where I used warm water on my abdomen and counter pressure on my back from a loving husband to make it through the next almost two hours. When I finally moved back to the bed to be checked, Joy told me I could push, and I felt so relieved that my body worked so quickly this time (thank goodness for zumba and being in such god shape) --even more relieved that after maybe 10 pushes she said she could see his head and it would just take a couple more to birth him and meet our second little boy. 

He came out pink and perfect, 8 pounds even and 19 1/4 inches long, with a head of dark hair, and I couldn't get over how much more I loved this birth experience than my last. The extra 3 weeks of pregnancy feel worth every bit, knowing I got a good 2 1/2 hours of skin to skin time after birth, followed by breastfeeding, and our little boy stayed with us in our room the entire time. Sharing those few quiet hours of bonding with this baby has created a lasting effect that I didn't know I missed so much with Emory. (Of course I felt bonded with him as well, but it's truly amazing to feel how well Penn and I know each other based on the closeness we had). I feel so great after giving birth that I get a surge of energy, and that energy kept me awake, listening to Jon's snores and baby's breathing, trying to imagine his name. We couldn't pinpoint the reason, but he really didn't look like a Jude, and we had no other ideas we could agree on at that point. 

The following morning we learned the full moon invited a packed L/D unit, so the staff us to a different floor for the rest of the day. My mom and sisters came for a visit, and Kendal and Amber stayed a while to help us find a name for the little guy. When Kendal suggested Penn, she referenced tennis, but I remembered that it was one of the only names I liked when we searched boy name lists months before. So Jon chose Emory's first name and I chose his middle name; I chose Penn's first name (with Kendal's help), and Jon chose his middle name. The rest of the day remained pretty relaxed--Jon Sr., Joy, and Nanny brought Emory, and despite the little man's apprehensions, he warmed up to Penn quickly and loved his little brother from the beginning. We fell in and out of sleep throughout the afternoon, shared the last of my room service, and my mom and Kenny came back to help for our discharge from the hospital around 5 or 5:30 pm. We left ready to go home with our new babe and rejoin with Emory.

We always had such fond feelings for the hospital where Emory was born, mostly due to the wonderful care he received in the NICU. I now have the same feelings towards Providence in Everett, but this time it's thanks to such a positive experience all throughout my pregnancy, as well as labor, delivery, and recovery. I love my midwife Joy, and so appreciate my nurse, Lisa as well. During labor, they helped keep the room peaceful and comfortable, with just the right amount of sense of humor. I'm almost sad to not be pregnant any longer, just to not get to visit with the midwives any more. Driving to Everett now means more than going to visit my family--it means going back to where Penn came to us for the first time. 

   

a little interview

I allowed him to stay in just undies because let's face it, that's his outfit most days at this age. And for the record, he knows his correct age now.

mini jon

This evening I felt so sleepy for whatever reason so Emory's new cars and the iPod became his babysitters while I struggled to stay awake on the living room chair. He heard the music on the ihome, found some headphones, and after realizing the headphones provided no sound, he proceeded to drape them over his shoulders and start to try to tie the cords. Upon being asked to explain, Emory replied that he wanted to be like at "chuuch" (church). So I offered to go retrieve a real tie from upstairs and after watching a tutorial on how to tie it, this was the result that remained for the rest of the night. Cute kid.

general conference traditions and things

Somehow it's become our tradition to have cinnamon rolls during General Conference. What's better is that we had the missionaries from our church and my sisters here to share with. So the 33 gooey goodnesses that are gone as of now are not all in my belly. All I have to say is Paula Deen, you're a woman who knows what to do when it comes to buttery, doughy, palatable pastry.

The recipe is just too good to not share.

Cinnamon Rolls, courtesy of Paula Deen, with a couple of my own adaptions, of course

Dough:
1 package yeast
1/2 c warm water
1/2 c scalded milk cooled to 110º F
1/4 c sugar
1/3 c melted butter or shortening (I used unsalted butter)
1 t salt
1 egg
3 1/2 to 4 c flour (I used closer to 3 1/2 in this climate and they turned out perfectly moist)

Filling:
1/2 c melted butter, plus more for pan (we used PLENTY in the pans)
3/4 c sugar, plus more for pan (I used 2 parts cane sugar, 1 part brown sugar)
2 T ground cinnamon
3/4 c raisins, walnuts, or pecans, optional (raisins--ew, and I would have used pecans, but one of the missionaries is allergic so I left them out and the rolls were still divine)

Glaze:
4 T softened butter
2 c powdered sugar (I always try to use less sugar in icing because I don't like it too sweet)
1 t vanilla extract (I always use more than called for)
3 to 6 T hot water

Directions:
Heat oven to 350º F.

In a small bowl, dissolve yeast in warm water and set aside. In a large bowl, mix cooled milk, sugar, melted butter, salt and egg. Add 2 cups of flour and mix until smooth. Add yeast mixture. Mix in remaining flour until dough is easy to handle. Knead dough on lightly floured surface for 5 to 10 minutes. Place in well-greased bowl, cover and let rise until double in size, usually 1 to 1 1/2 hours.

When doubled in size, punch down dough. Roll out on a floured surface into a 15 by 9-inch rectangle. Spread melted butter all over dough. Mix sugar and cinnamon and sprinkle over buttered dough. Sprinkle with nuts or raisins (again, ew!), if desired. Beginning at the 15-inch side, roll up dough and pinch edge together to seal. Cut into 12 to 15 slices. (I doubled the recipe and had 33, some pretty small). Coat the baking pan with butter and sprinkle with sugar. Place cinnamon roll slices close together in the pan and let rise until dough is doubled, about 45 minutes. Bake for 30 minutes (I think mine were in for 20 so watch them closely, and make sure your over rack is not all the way to the bottom--let's just say my pan on the bottom had some really caramelized butter and sugar going on).

Meanwhile, mix butter, powdered sugar, and vanilla. Add hot water 1 T at a time until the glaze reaches desired consistency. Spread over slightly cooled rolls.

Eat and enjoy, then thank me and Paula Deen later.

Now that we've spent the past two days enjoying conference from our home (can I just say I absolutely love the spirit it brings to our home), I feel more ready to face challenges and the call to be better, more patient and kind, less judgmental, and happier because of it all. Emory was really pretty good, and it was a treat to have the missionaries and Kendal and Amber here with us. 

Favorite talk. It's a great message for anyone, mormon or not.

Photos courtesy of Instagram. Follow me @megbeutler.